從「人際關係距離學」看「排隊禮儀」
（知書也達禮～禮賓工作的會客室 ）
在公共場合排隊中，可以觀察人與人的距離，正好反應一個社會的文明程度與人群之間的信賴感，排隊候車、結帳、掛號等接受服務，已是現代社會的基本禮貌與行為規範，現在進一步強調的是人與人之間的「安全距離」與「信賴區間」，每個人都有一個安全距離，現代心理學甚至發展出一門「人際距離學」（Proxemics）的研究領域。根據美國學者Hall的研究[1]指出，所謂「人際距離」 (interpersonal distance, personal distance )指的是人與人之間所欲保持的安全與舒適的距離(body space and comfort zone)，並依據人際間親疏關係不同，人際間距離自然也不同，因此由親而疏分為4種不同的情境：
1、親密區(intimate zone)：容許別人與自己極為接近，在距離上從身體接觸到0.5公尺左右，容許進入親密區者，只限於彼此具有親情與愛情等關係的人。
2、個人區(personal distance zone)：有交情的朋友之間按交情深淺不同，大約彼此保持0.5公尺~1.5公尺之間。這是人際間稍有分寸感的距離，較少直接的身體接觸，但能夠友好交談，讓彼此感到親密的氣息。一般說來只有熟人和朋友才能進入這個距離。人際交往中，個人距離通常是在「非正式」社交情境中使用，在正式社交場合則使用社交距離。
3、社交區(social distance zone)：在一般社交應酬場所，人際距離在1.5至3公尺之間。這是一種「社交」或「禮節」上的人際距離，也是我們在辦公室中經常見到的。彼此保持這種距離給人一種自在與安全感，不會覺得受到侵犯，也不會覺得太生疏，可以友好互動交談。
4、公眾區(public distance zone)：在一般公眾場所3公尺以上，例如舉行演講。因此，就一般的社交場合與公共場所而言，現代人一般活動的人際距離大約在0.5至1公尺左右，依每個不同地區的人而有所不同，拘謹嚴肅的人人際距離較大，而熱情的拉丁美洲人的人際距離則較短。陌生的兩人距離太近，逾越個人主觀的「安全距離」會使人開始感到不安或覺得受到威脅，假如兩人有交談等互動，距離太遠又會使人覺得疏遠，因此，在各種場合面對不同親疏關係的人士，特別是異性之間，要保持適當的「安全距離」，勿太近讓人覺得不適，也不要太遠造成誤會，依以上所提到的標準，大約保持50至80公分為宜，在公共場合排隊亦是如此，也可以根據不同場合的空間與排隊人數多寡來調整彼此間的距離。特別像是在自動提款機前，有關於交易安全與個人隱私，後方排隊者與正在操作提款機者一定保持相當的距離，也是一項需要遵守的禮貌。
在一個文明有教養的社會，人與人之間會有較多的信賴感，表現在「排隊」這一方面，會保持一個讓彼此覺得舒適的距離，即便中間留有相當的空隙，也不會擔心被人插隊，這正是人與人間的「信賴區間」；相反的，如果在一個常常發生不遵守秩序的社會，排隊者自然而然擔心會被他人插隊，因此人與人之間排隊等候的距離變近，以減少被人插隊的機會，人際之間的「信賴區間」縮短，也正代表人群信任感減少，公民社會就不易達成。
另外，不同排隊的習慣也表現出不同的禮儀。例如，國內上洗手間如遇到人數眾多，習慣是進入後選擇一間廁所門外等候，但在許多國家，人們習慣在洗手間入口外面等候，等有人離開才進入，如此一出一進，等候者公平使用，廁所內也不會擠滿等候人潮而阻礙進出動線，但國人似乎沒有這習慣與觀念，尤其是在國外使用公共廁所，無視入口排隊等候者便長驅直入，常常引起他人錯愕與側目，筆者在澳洲與日本，便有這方觀察與體驗，國人不可不多加注意。
說起排隊學問大，國內以往在大賣場、速食店、銀行、郵局等公共場所，民眾都是自行選擇一處服務視窗排隊，有時別的窗口隊伍消化快速，不多久排隊人數就少了一半，自己排的這一行卻偏偏靜止不動，令人氣惱。有時別的新窗口一開，排在後方的人全都搶先佔位，殿後反倒成了最前，更是令人氣結。目前許多有組織的公民營機構，已改變以往的作法，採取抽取號碼排的方式，確實改善不公平的情況，民眾也不需要排成長龍，只需坐在大廳座椅舒舒服服的等待燈號，這正是所謂的"first-come,first-serve"原則，公平合理又舒適，的確是現代社會的一大進步。
從日常生活的排隊文化，從心理學與社會學的角度來看，的確有著理論基礎與實際上的運用。排隊不只是排隊，其中可是有大學問來著！
[1] Hall, E. T., "The Hidden Dimension", New York:Doubleday & Company, 1966.
◎以下引述心理學家Hall對人際距離研究的闡述：
Why the distances?
We like to keep our distance from others and there are very specific social rules about how close we can go to others in particular situations.This social distance is also known as body space and comfort zone and the use of this space is called proxemics.
Why the distance?
Regulating the distances between us and other people provides us with several benefits, including:
Safety: When people are distant, they can't surprise attack us.
Communication: When people are closer, it is easier to communicate with them.
Affection: When they are closer still, we can be intimate.
Threat: The reverse can be used - you may deliberately threaten a person by invading their body space.
Social distances
The social distances here are approximate, of course and will vary with people. But they are still a good general rule. Hall (1966) identified four zones that are common for Americans:
Public Zone : > 12 feet ( 3m )
The public zone is generally over 12 feet. That is, when we are walking around town, we will try to keep at least 12 feet between us and other people. For example, we will leave that space between us and the people walking in front.Of course there are many times when we cannot do this. What the theory of social distance tells us is that we will start to notice other people who are within this radius. The closer they get, the more we become aware and ready ourselves for appropriate action.
When we are distant from another person, we feel a degree of safety from them.A person at a distance cannot attack us suddenly. If they do seem to threaten,we will have time to dodge, run or prepare for battle.
Social Zone : 4 - 12 feet ( 1.5m - 3m )
Within the social zone, we start to feel a connection with other people. When they are closer, then we can talk with them without having to shout, but still keep them at a safe distance.This is a comfortable distance for people who are standing in a group but maybe not talking directly with one another. People sitting in chairs or gathered in a room will tend to like this distance.
Personal Zone : 1.5-4 feet ( 0.5m - 1.5m )
In the personal zone, the conversation gets more direct, and this is a good distance for two people who are talking in earnest about something.
Intimate Zone < 1.5 feet (< 0.5m )
When a person is within arms reach or closer, then we can touch them in intimate ways.We can also see more detail of their body language and look them in they eyes. When they are closer, they also blot out other people so all we can see is them (and vice versa).Romance of all kinds happens in this space. Entering the intimate zone of somebody else can be very threatening. This is sometimes doneas a deliberate ploy to give a non-verbal signal that they are powerful enough to invade your territory at will.
Varying rules
The rules about social distance vary with different groups of people. You can detect this by watching people's reactions. If you feel safe and they seem not to feel safe, back off. If they invade your space, decide whether to invade back or act otherwise. Turning sideways is an easy alternative for this, as a person to the side is less threatening than a person at the same distance in front of you.
Town and country
People who live in towns spend more time close to one another and so their social distances may compact somewhat.In a large and crowded city, the distances will be less than in a small town.People who normally live a long way from others will expand their social distances and may even have to lean over towards another person to shake hands and then back off to a safe distance.Different countries also have different rules about social distances. The overcrowded nature of some Asian countries means that they are accustomed to talking to others from a very close distance.Watch a Japanese person talking at a party with a person from the Western countryside. The Japanese will step in and the Westerner will step back. Speeded up it is like a dance around the room.
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